Browsing all posts in Babies.

If I Were Writing iPhone Apps…

While I generally love the slogan, “There’s an App for That!” I have to admit that sometimes it goes a tad too far. Like now–Geek Dad just profiled a new app for moms. This app was obviously written by men. Men who had too much time on their hands. Men who were seriously having a [...]

Thou Shalt Steal the Pacifier

No one is afraid of an itty, bitty baby, right? I mean, they’re so cute and cuddly. And moms are MUCH bigger. So they win all arguments with said itty, bitty baby. And if you can’t win an argument with a BABY, what are your odds of winning an argument with a TEENAGER? And yet–anyone [...]

Not So Intelligent Design

Or, perhaps, God is a man after all. That’s the only other explanation. Which might actually be the same explanation. I, personally, could have done a much better job. And I’m not even omniscient (shh-don’t tell the kids). Consider the following points: While babies heads got bigger, the space you have to push them out [...]

How Not to Become a Zombie

Becoming a zombie is easy.

Go out, get pregnant (If you need specifics on how to accomplish this, email me. We need to talk).

Once the baby is born, BOOM. You’ll be a zombie.

Circumcision, Anyone?

There are a few dilemmas that affect the parents of boys a bit more often than the parents of girls. That’s because there actually ARE differences between little boys and little girls. I know. You’re shocked, right? For instance, do you let them grow their hair out, just because they loved Lord of the Rings [...]

I Taught my Baby to Spell in Utero!

The Houston Chronicle published this bit on Tuesday: “Paige Vasseur of Valencia, California, never gazed at an alphabet mobile above her crib, but the contestant for the national spelling bee this week had an earlier lexical advantage. The womb. Her mother, Maria, not only sang her the ABCs in utero, but began reading to her [...]

The Blankie

Blankies are the loveys of every tiny tot. And the bane of every mother’s existence. They can’t live without them, so they get carted around, everywhere. Which means: 1) they get lost, engendering a half-day search through the house, the neighborhood, the last fifty places graced with your presence, only to find it under a [...]

Baby’s First Words….Umh…

Designed to tug at the heartstrings of every new parent, the first words out of a baby’s mouth (and I mean words, not screeches) are eagerly anticipated by the entire household.

Somewhere around a year, the new child learns that he can attach sounds to items.

Moms and dads lean close, and wait to hear that magic word, “Lawnmower.”