Pregnant Busybodies-Sunday Rehash

Sunday, April 19, 2009
Busybodies Little Old Ladies Motherhood Other people Pregnancy
Photo by Bianca de Blok, stock.xchng

Photo by Bianca de Blok, stock.xchng

(Originally published 1/23/09)

There’s something about a pregnant woman that invites everyone she meets to talk to her. People who never spoke to her for the seven years that she has shared an elevator with them suddenly have a vested interest in her health, her pregnancy, and her life.

So, since the constant heartburn, unrelenting nausea, basketball pushing into the diaphragm, and fat feet are not enough indignities, a woman with child is also with annoying strangers.

They want to touch her tummy. They want to know when the baby is due, because, apparently, they are going to plan their lives around her due date. They want to know if it’s a boy or a girl. Maybe they’re taking a poll involving current male-female birth ratios.
Pregnant women everywhere should revolt. Stop letting little old ladies and busy-bodies touch your tummy and trod on your privacy. You wouldn’t have talked to these people before you were showing, would you?

Some suggestions for protecting yourself against the meddlesome masses:

Turn to the stranger admiring your ballooned belly, and say, with a completely straight face, “Excuse me? I’m not pregnant.” They’ll never bother a pregnant woman again.

Or: Clutch your belly and start screaming with labor pains. This is especially effective in elevators, where everyone will get off at the next floor (NOTE: Doesn’t work in hospitals. You’ll have an elevator full of volunteer midwives).

If it’s against your nature to be intentionally rude, but you still can’t manage to make it through one more day of answering the same questions again and again, posed by total strangers, you could always hang a sign around your neck that says: “First baby. 8 months. Girl. Don’t tell me your pregnancy horror story.”

Or get it printed on a tee shirt.

Send this to the person bothering you today!
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3 Comments

Wendy

Sunday, 19th April 2009 at 9:38 pm
 

The only thing I noticed a lot when I was hugely pregnant with my daughter (finishing a semester of college) is that I gained a loyal following of college boys. They followed me from class to class and escorted me everywhere. They wanted my advice on women, on life, on everything. And to tell me things like, “I married my wife because she was pregnant, then she miscarried. I don’t know if we would have married otherwise. Now I don’t know what to do.”

I guess I was safe, maternal, and they were all scared boys. It stopped when baby was born and they all went away.

Wendy’s last blog post..Double Book Report

Carol @SheLives

Sunday, 3rd May 2009 at 9:22 am
 

That’s no fun at all!

I like guessing the sex just by looking at the belly. I’m right a lot. It’s fun to see their eyes get big when they say, “How did you know?”

From now on my reply will be, “We busy-bodies have our secret ways.”